Q: I’m struggling with a life view that I’ve always carried and recently learned could be coined anti-natalism. I have no children. Since I was very young, I felt it was no great favor to have been born at all. I have been blessed with belief and faith in God and my church. Yet I believe that if I wanted to parent, then adoption would be the right thing to do and to avoid bringing more people into this. It isn’t about population control or the environment but pain — the struggle to gain security and negotiate who can be believed and trusted and let into the core of one’s life. The world is so dangerous and such a battlefield — why would anyone intentionally put someone out there? I struggle because I hear that life is a gift. I struggle with that. While I don’t say it out loud, I support those who have families. I love my nieces and nephews and many children out of appreciation for their existence and try to bring them joy, but it’s almost out of sympathy. Help. While I find purpose and satisfaction in faithful prayer and in participation in my work and marriage, I know that this is part of who I am. What does God think? Why was this planted in my genetic coding, and what does he want me to make of it? — Lori

Answered by Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC:

It’s good that you love your nieces and nephews and many children and to try to bring them joy.

Yet you mention anti-natalism, which seems to indicate that you struggle with ambivalence in your outlook.

You also mention it was no great favor to have been born, yet you find purpose and satisfaction in your prayer and work and marriage. Again, a sign of ambivalence.

A few big-picture points are worth considering.

First, people are good. People are made in the image of God. The world is good. For God created everything, and being God, he only creates what is good.

His first command to human beings gave them a share in his creative power: “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth” (Genesis 1:28).

So, God established marriage and intended for babies to be born and for people to fill the earth. That is, in part, why he made such a big, beautiful world.

The problem, however, is that our first parents sinned and so brought suffering and disorder into the world. We see the results all around us — and in us.

Still, God’s plan moved forward. He still wants babies; he still wants to fill the earth.

And he sent his Son to redeem us and to help us overcome the struggles of life. The key is to rely on him and not to be hampered by our own way of seeing things.

We have reasons for hope even amid the gloom of the world. Jesus is more powerful than sin and the forces of darkness.

That said, it might be good to seek some kind of spiritual direction and possibly a bit of help from a solid Catholic counselor. Having a good prayer life generally brings a sense of hope and joy. If you are lacking that sense, there might be personal issues that need to be addressed.

For now, try to find a solid confessor to guide you, and try meditating on Pope Benedict XVI’s encyclical Spe Salvi (Saved in Hope). May its message resonate with you.